Thursday, August 27, 2009

Assalammualaikum.
It's been a while since i wrote here (i think this is the very sentence i usually use).
I'm pretty busy lately, what with the new Medicine batch coming in, me becoming an O O (orientation officer) though i am not actually active in it.
And i hv piles of notes to revise; Immuno, Patho, Microbio, Parasito, Virology etc etc...
Not to forget my semester 1 topics which will also be tested in less than 3 months time.

Ramadhan so far has been fun and enjoyable.
Looking forward for a lot more things.

I'd like to congratulate all my friends that had made it to IMU, welcome to IMU (as if any of them is reading this, i doubt they are).
Life in IMU is not as tough as it sounds, neither is it as friendly as we want.
But whatever lies in our path, it's always in our hands to make the best out of it.
We are given intelligent, amusing minds to judge ourselves and the environment, to know what is right or what is wrong.
We are given soul to enjoy what we are having, to appreciate the life we are bestowed with, and to appreciate the ppl around us.
And we are given faith for us to hold on strongly to. For us to fall back on in case our minds and soul failed us.

There are a lot more things we can do with all these (mind, soul and faith) but i'm not listing all of them. I will be writing and writing and missed the opportunity to go to Shah Alam tonight.

Why am i suddenly so philosophical?
No logic reason. Suddenly feel like writing it.
Dont even mind if nobody reads. Hahaha...

What has it got anything to do with tomorrow?
Oh! Tomorrow i'll be meeting my best friends!!! Atikah and Ain!! Here i come!! Nk menyibuk kt rmh korg...!! =P

Friday, August 21, 2009

Assalammualaikum my dear friends!!!
I'm in a happy, jolly good mood now..
Why?
Cos tomorrow is the first day of fasting month...!
But why did i put the title of this post in BM?
Simply because "Yay yay! Tomorrow is the time to fast!" sounds awkward to me, and it doesnt bring the joy and excitement i want it to.

Why is fasting month or specifically, this yea r's fasting month overjoyed me?
I can't answer that myself.
Perhaps i have a lot of dopamine circulating in me.
And also, perhaps it's because this is the first time i'm gonna fast in IMU, and i can't wait to see how it goes.
And maybe I am a little bit more grown up this year that I started to appreciate the benefit of Ramadhan, the holy month.

So here, i'd like to tell a few stories abt the Ramadhans i went thru. =)

When I was born
Feeling weird? How can i tell a story that happened when i was born?
Well, my mum told me this story (as most of u will probably hv brilliantly guessed).
I was born on the 3rd of Ramadhan.
And my father was a tailor, in our small house in Kg Pasir, Ulu Klang abt 19 yrs back.
I remembered he had 3 sewing machines when i was abt 10; I'm not sure how many he had when I was born.
When I was still a less-than-a-month baby, or a neonate as medical field puts it, I was always shocked.
Not by electricity, but by noises.


Whenever my father pressed the pedal on his sewing machine, it will produce a very loud sound. Perhaps it wasnt loud enough for an adult, but it was certainly enough to scare me off and woke me up.
And i'll start crying. I'll be very shocked and my mother needed to calm me down.
And since we were staying in a small, little peaceful village, the kids always play firecrackers during the fasting season (doesn't that sound familiar? Kids always like to play firecrackers"
And they always play in front of my house.
Whenever any of the firecrackers explode, i'll get shocked and scared and woke up and started crying again.
And so my mother needed to soothe me down again.
And that happened every night.
That is why (my mother said), i'm easily shocked @ frightened.
I jumped out of my skin easily.
My mother is still jokingly blaming my father for it.

During my pre-school years
My family have this one yearly tradition. We wil go to our relative's hse at least once every Ramadhan to break fast with them.
We usually drove to Kuantan, Pahang for that purpose but this year, due to some internal affairs, we might not be able to make it.

But anyway, one day during my pre-school years, my mother decided to go to my grand uncle's hse to break fast. And of course, we'll bring some food from home and my mother cooked crab at that time. I dont know what the menu is called but my hse will simply address the dish as "cook crab" or "masak ketam" in Bahasa.
And crab is one of my favourite food. And so, on that day i excitedly fast.
Well, my mother had always been lenient to me. When i was small, i always fast half day.
Rarely do i get to fast one whole day. But i do now, of course!

So on the day my mother cooked crab that year, i fasted one whole day.
My grand uncle's hse wasnt far from our little hse in the small village.
So at around 5pm, we were still at home.
And my mother asked me to buy something at the grocery shop while she cook.
My mother told me that ppl who do not fast can't break fast, and that will mean that that person cannot eat the breaking fast dishes.
While at the grocery store, I bought myself an ice-cream.

And on my way back, i ate the ice cream and when i was passed thru some houses along the way, with their residents hanging out in front of their houses, the residents looked at me weirdly (i think or so i imagined).
I didnt care, i continued to lick my ice-cream until it suddenly strucked me: i was fasting!!!
And i'm not supposed to eat that ice cream!
But by that time, the ice cream finished. I dropped the ice cream stick and ran back home, panickly.

I rushed to my mum and apologised and pleaded and begged to her so that i can still eat the crab. I told her that i forgot i was fasting and i finished one ice cream on the way back from the grocery store.
I was very very panicked and sad and angry because i couldn't eat the crab now, bcause i didnt fast.

But my mother laughed and said Allah will forgive me.
I was still a kid, and i forgot that i was fasting. It's not like i purposedly ate the ice cream.
And so she said my fast was still valid. I was still considered "the one who fast" and was still entitled for the crab.
It relieved me, but i was still embarrased. I kept repeating to my mother that all the uncles and aunts in front of their hse just now will think that i am a girl who do not fast. I was so sure that all the uncles and aunts will laugh at me.

But come to think of it again now, if i see a 4, 5 year old Muslim girl eating in front of me in the fasting month, i will never laugh at them. Bcause it's totally normal.

And so, before we reached my grand uncle's hse, i made my mother swore not to tell them that i accidentally finished an ice cream. Hahaha...
And i dont think she did, bcos if she really did, i think i'll definitely remember their laughter.

One day during my lower secondary school years
Another incident was when i was in my lower secondary.
I forgot which year was it exactly but at that time, my mother was still a teacher in my school.
It was a school holiday but my mother needed to go to school to finish off her work (she's such a workaholic).

And so i followed her to school.
My mother was the library teacher and so, she had her desk in the office in the library.
She left me in her office alone while she went down to the school admin office.
In her office, there was one big tin of biscuits.
The biscuits are for her fellow student librarians who needed to stay back for their duty.
If the student is a morning session stdnt, he/she will hv to stay during the evening and vice versa.

So i took the biscuits and ate them.

I ate until my mother came back to her office and upon seeing me eating the biscuit, she asked surprisedly, "Aren't u fasting?"
I was blurr and i said, "What?"
And then she said, "Dear, this is the fasting month. Remember?"

And i choked when she said that.
I ran out of her office, went to the corridor and spitted out every single biscuits left in my mouth at that time.
And i felt awful.
How could i forget i was fasting??
And i ate a lot of biscuits already when she was away.

But then i told myself, "Okay, let's assume the biscuits i ate are my luck. It's not like i purposely eat it".
And so, i continued to fast.

Today
Today, I am almost 20.
And i really hope any kind of those incidents wont occur again to me this time.
Pray for me, and i'll pray for u guys too.
Haha...
So again, my best wishes for all Muslims starting to fast tomorrow....
Salam Ramadhan!

Assalammualaikum...!

-AkMaR-
http://akmarr90.blogspot.com

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Assalammualaikum wrt wbt. I have been silent for quite a while. Was it because I was busy? Nope, it was simply because I didn’t know what to write. My brain went “dry” for a few days. I was always online, checking out my fb, putting out some shoutouts but did not write anything in my blog.

So today I think I hv some things to write abt. But before that, let me thank Asip for his sincere comment. Haha… The comment brightened my day and motivated me to write today. =P

(Asip, x perlu la kembang2 sgt ye… )







Today, 20th August 2009, a date I’ve been waiting for a long time. Because of this date, one of my bestfriends cancelled our shopping outing together (not that I’m still angry abt it). Because of this date too, my friends have been posting up countdowns in fb everyday. What’s so special abt this date? Bet u all knew by now. IT’S THE DATE JUNE 09 A LEVEL RESULTS WILL BE RELEASED!!!!













A lot of my friends are getting their results today.

Atikah warned me few weeks in advance, DO NOT CALL ME. I’LL CALL U AND TELL U MY RESULTS. IF THE RESULT’S NOT GOOD, I’M NOT MEETING ANY OF U AGAIN”.

Diana told me, I’m not going to call you, I’ll only be calling Farahin. I’ll not call u.”















The results were supposed to be out at 2pm so I anticipated nervously for the watch in my hand to strike 2pm but abt 10mins before 2, Ain msg-ed me. “Alhamdulillah Ain dpt 14”. At that time I was in the surau, wanting to perform my zuhur prayer. I can’t help but

squeaked in joy. But she also mentioned a bad news; she’ll be flying to Ireland next Sunday, 30th August 2009.

That’s even earlier than Atikah’s departure!!!

Haiyoo… Another friend leaving me.

And I planned to spend the Merdeka Celebration weekend with Ain, Atikah and Fatin in my hse, Seremban and in Melaka. It’s just too unfortunate that she’ll be leaving on the same weekend.





After my zuhur prayer, I called Fatin. She told me that she got 14. And I can sense the joy in her voice and I too, am very happy for her. I just can’t stop smiling to myself. But then, now left with Atikah. I dare not call her, and I told both Ain and Fatin that she warned me not to call her, so I was hoping that any of them will call Atikah and tell me her results.



And so, I went to IMU library, stayed their quietly facing my Immunology book. But my mind wasn’t focused. I scrolled through my phonebook and text almost every A Lvl friends I have, asking for their results. For what? I didn’t know. To share their joy? Perhaps… Merely to be a busybody? Perhaps too… Or just to know how they fair in the exam? I can’t answer my own confusions.

But anyway, congrats to Suyin, Syafiq, Siew Huang, Kang Wee, and Ah Siong for scoring 15! And congrats to Kartik, for scoring 14…!

Some of my other friends did not reply to my msg. I can only guess they missed my msg when they were busy calling their parents or bestfriends informing of their good results.



So, back to Atikah (the mysterious one). I waited and waited and waited and waited for her call. I imagined a lot of things (my imaginations are sometimes beyond my control) but I shrugged all of it off. I know I shdn’t be speculating too much.



And approximately 5 minutes before 3pm, I received a call from Atikah. I was in the library; I jumped out of my seat and was ready to run to the door, scared that my reaction over the phone call might disturb other library users. And as soon as I answered the call (I was still rushing to the door at that time, I suddenly regretted choosing the desk far from the door), Atikah shouted out, “Akmar!!! Aku dpt 15!!!!” I felt like screaming my heart out, I was so happy. But I quickly regained control of myself, grudgingly reminding myself that I’m not in my bedroom where I can jump up and down of my bed screaming but I was in the library, full of students trying to absorb as many facts into their minds as possible. And so, with a very steady voice I congratulated Atikah and told her I felt like screaming but can’t as I am in the library. My heart pounded so fast that I think it may just explode out of my blouse. And I literally couldn’t stop grinning. As soon as I was out of the library, I screamed (the lowest decibel of scream I can afford) in joy. I wasn’t sure if anyone noticed me but I just did not care anymore. Atikah told me she got 100 marks for 3 papers namely Chem U3, Math C1 but I forgot the other one.



So here, I’d like to congratulate Atikah for getting a 15, Ain for getting 14 and Fatin for getting 14!!! CONGRATULATIONS!!! While I’m writing this, Diana has not yet inform me of her results and I dare not call or ask her.



When I was out of the library, answering Atikah’s call, I re-noticed (is there such a word?) a booth one floor up of the library. It was a booth set up by Malaysian Society of Parasitology and Tropical Medicine and they are conducting a seminar on H1N1 in the Chancellor Hall. The reason I mentioned I re-notice it was because I noticed it the first time earlier this afternoon, after my lecture and I was informed that the seminar starts at 3pm. And it is free… Of course it attracts me! I have been seeing a lot of seminar posters lately and their titles are always interesting but they are always very pricey. As expensive as RM250 (early bird student price)! How can I afford? In addition, I’m still in my first year, I’d better not spend my money on those seminars YET. But this time, it’s free. So I told myself that I will go for it. And lucky enough, Atikah called me, I went out of the library and re-notice the booth, reminding me of the seminar I intended to go. As soon as Atikah put the phone down, I went to the booth and they welcomed me with open hands (very very widely, I guess it’s because there weren’t many audience in the hall). So I told them I need to get my notebook and pen and I came again with a notepad and a pen. I went into the hall and found that the hall was only quarter-filled. Sad isn’t it? And I think I was the only student there. =P



When they asked me to register my name at the booth before going into the hall, I timidly wrote “student” as my post in the form but the names on top of mine were lecturers, researchers… shy shy… But still, I went in quietly through the back door and took the empty seat nearest to the door. And I thought every eyes were looking at me, and wondering, what is this student doing here? But I pretended “professional”… Hahaha, in the same time wondering to myself, do I really look that young? Do I really look like a student or worse, a first year medical student? What Atikah told me few times before was true, at this age, we’ll always feel ALL eyes are looking at us, scrutinising us from head to toe when really, there was nobody paying attention to us. One of the first few faces that I saw in the hall was my own Statistics lecturer, a community medicine doctor. And as soon as I sit, I saw another lecturer of mine, and another, and another and then I realised, “Jeez, this hall is full of my lecturers. Why on Earth am I in the same seminar room as they are in?”



Ok, enough of telling abt my feelings, I’ll talk abt the content of the seminar.

One of the doctors pointed out, passionately, that wearing mask is not effective at all. His reason being the virus is 200-300 times smaller than the holes on the finest mask. Hahaha… something that made me think too. According to my Microbiology lecture (I actually checked my lecture notes on this), the size of a virus particle is abt 300nm-400nm. How small can the hole on the mask be? Some of the facts I got to know during the seminar were:



1) The H1N1 strain attacking the human population is a mixture of North American Swine Flu virus, Eurasian Swine Flu virus, North American Avian Flu virus and the seasonal human influenza virus. Hence, this strain of H1N1 virus is a novel (new) virus, not a mutation of an older strain.

2) The flu was initially called swine flu due to the dominance by the swine flu virus but as the doctor presenting the paper said jokingly, the swine population somehow won and managed to “force” the human population to change the name, and not blaming the swine.

3) Pigs serve as the “mixing vessel” of the virus as it is infected by avian virus and also human virus. (I think it’s because pigs eat basically anything. The faeces of roosters and humans infected with the virus included. That’s how pigs successfully inoculated a completely new virus in them. Remember, Allah mentioned that swine is not for us, human!)

4) The test to confirm H1N1 virus cost about RM1500 but if done in a large group, it will cost about RM750. Very costly so now, the world is no more testing for H1N1. They’ll give Tamiflu to risky patients regardless of whether they hv been or hv not been tested positive for H1N1. This is the main reason the exact number of H1N1 positive cases cannot be reported and hence, the fatality rate cannot be counted.



5) Tamiflu cannot be prescribed to mothers in the first trimester because that is the time foetus is developing the organs. Due to ethical reasons, no experimental drugs were tested on pregnant mothers thus nobody knows the side effects of Tamiflu on foetal development.

6) Since experimental drugs cannot be tested on mothers, the only way to know if foetus is affected by the drugs are by “learning from mistakes”. In some cases where the mother’s life is at stake, drugs will be prescribed to the mother because mother’s life is the first priority while foetus’ life comes in second. So if the foetus were born deformed, and same cases are reported somewhere else, it can be concluded that that specific drug DO have an adverse effect on the foetus.



I think I’ll stop here for now, I have been writing too much already. I hate it when I have to end my writing abruptly due to time constrain but, what to do, I have some other things to do like……oh ya, studying! =P



Oh yes! My father had just came back from Pulau Tioman for a 4 days 3 nights work trip. He had a shooting there (my father is NOT a celebrity, he's working for a media company).

And he bought me this!

Though it's small, but it meant a lot to me given the fact that my father rarely buys ornament for me. Hahaha...



So, cheerio!

And congrats again to all my brilliant, smart friends! I am very very very proud of u guys!!



-AkMaR-

http://akmarr90.blogspot.com



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